Things have been going well as of late. We have now been in a relationship with another couple since Janurary, though we didn't all really acknowledge it was that until a little later. I've been posting off and on about it and this is just a quick update.
Everyone has been doing fairly well. Sure we've had a few speed bumps but most relationships of any type encounter issues. The level of communication and willingness to allow this in each others lives has been impressive. I've read numerous posts, articles, and blogs about how this shouldn't work but in our cases it is at this point. I've also read a number of blogs and posts on the Internet that suggests that this can work if approached the right way with all involved.
Each of our relationships with one another have gone through various stages and at different speeds. The female half of the other couple and I hit it off fast and hard. I think it's the way we both operate though we both experienced fear of what this is all about and how things would turn out. I think the reason we've been able to gt through it is a combination of efforts to meet each other half way. After 16 and 18 years of marriage, each married couple has a pattern in which they relate to on another. This type of relationship turns that on its head, and it's literally a brand new relationship is created. New relationships are not always controlled by years of making one another wrong, or patterns we utilize in our communications with one another. Plus the individuality of each person in the relationship is important as well.
There have been a few jealousy/envy issues in the relationship. Most of these have been resolved through communication and allowing that individual the space to work it out. In most cases this has worked and I imagine it should continue to get better as well. In some ways trial and emotional issues make a relationship stronger, as long as individuals don't use the situation to make others feel wrong, or use it to make others feel guilty.
Currently the male half has been at our home yesterday and today. His wife/my girlfriend just left with on of her girl friends for a 8 day cruise. We wanted him to come over last night, which he did, and we've had a ball with him, playing board games with our kids, then watching Tosh.0 last night, all three of us on a bed together, which of course turned into what my wife quotes, "my best orgasm EVER!!". That seems like a pretty good deal for her, which she freely admits.
One thing that is kind of unique to our situation, we've been really clear that not everyone in this foursome is ready to completely end the swinging lifestyle. Though we're all now fluid bonded (meaning we've not had sex with anyone else but one another for over 3 months and we've been STD tested - so condoms are now optional). We still realize that some of us what to still hookup with new people and some of us would rather focus on what is already there. My wife and the male half want to continue to go to parties. They did both commit though to full protection and that includes oral. One activity we may do together is practice creating dental dams with a regular condom.
This truly has been worth it and I can honestly say that I've never been happier in my life then I am now. In some ways I've found this to be much more "moral" then swinging. I know for sure it's much more full filling then swinging. So it's difficult to describe our exact status but we're happy to make it up as we go, without labels or are we worried what others think. I know when I post one of these happy poly articles I will tend to get a "be careful", or "you are going to end up unhappy" posts. Sorry to disappoint some of you, but this has been an awesome experience!!
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